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Baltimore County Family Law Attorney Blog

Baltimore & Towson Lawyer Discusses What Divorcing Parents Should and Should Not Do

Written by Amar Weisman » May 30, 2013 »

Divorce is typically a stressful, difficult, and emotional ordeal for parents to go through, even under the most amicable of circumstances. No matter how much both parents may realize the need for or desire for a divorce, it is still hard to endure and accept the massive life changes necessary to make a divorce happen. As a result, your Baltimore family law attorney has often observed that the mental and physical health of both parents and children may suffer, especially while divorce proceedings are ongoing.

A recent Fox News article pointed out some tips that may be helpful for families who are proceeding with a divorce. First, the initial inclination in a divorce is often to blame the other parent. No one wants to be the one responsible for causing a divorce, and it is easy to blame your ex-spouse when everything in your life seems to be falling apart. However, divorce isn’t about taking sides, or winning and losing, especially from the perspective of your children. Most children are merely aware that the two people whom they love most in the world suddenly do not want to be with each other, and their whole world has shifted. It is important for parents to remember that your ex-spouse is going to be a part of your children’s lives – and therefore, part of your life – for a very long time to come. There is no quicker way to hurt or alienate your children than to put down their other parent in front of them. It might feel good to bash your ex in the short-term, but it will only strain your relationship with your children in the long-term.

Next, working out custody and visitation arrangements with your ex can be a stressful process, particularly in the beginning of a separation when neither of you are accustomed to making such arrangements or decisions. As you struggle to accommodate work schedules along with your children’s sport or activity schedules, you may find yourself becoming very angry with your ex over the need to work out such detailed plans. In these situations, you must keep in mind that if the schedule that is agreed upon is in the best interest of your children, then you are doing the right thing.

Parenting with your ex also can become more difficult when you now live in two separate households. What may be unacceptable to you in terms of parenting – allowing your children to stay-up past midnight, permitting junk food for dinner, letting them watch R-rated movies, etc. – may be acceptable to your ex. However, instead of automatically berating your ex for his or her parenting decisions, realize that you cannot control what happens in his or her household. Short of behavior that places your children’s lives in danger, your Baltimore family law attorney can tell you that you do not have the right to control or dictate what your children do while under the other parent’s care.

Finally, keep an open mind when your ex inevitably begins to date again. It is only a matter of time before this happens. No matter how inappropriate you may think it is, there will come a time when your ex wishes to introduce your children to a new significant other. Ideally, you will know about this occurrence beforehand and even meet the person yourself. Whatever happens, however, you should show respect for the new person in your ex’s life, even if you secretly disapprove. Your children will make their own judgments soon enough about the new significant other. Besides, you ultimately cannot control whom your ex chooses to be with anyway.

While these are some practical tips for dealing with common situations that arise between divorcing parents, there are other scenarios that may arise that are far more complex and may necessitate legal advice. When these situations occur, contact your Baltimore family law attorney today, and get the advice that you need to best deal with these matters.

Call (410) 321-4994 For a Free Consultation 

Call The Law Offices of Amar S. Weisman at (410) 321-4994 to schedule a Free ConsultationThe Purpose of the consultation is to determine whether you want to retain this law firm as your Baltimore County & Harford County Family Lawyer. If you do wish to proceed, then you must pay a retainer. See Our Policy on Fees and Costs. The family firm is located next to The Circuit Court for Baltimore County, at 1018 Dulaney Valley Road, Towson, MD 21204.